Being “judgmental” is one of the greatest social sins you can commit today. You can hold any ideas you may care to, but you absolutely may not ever make somebody else feel uncomfortable or “othered” because of his or her lifestyle or beliefs. As Christians we know that God expects us to witness to his Word and hold onto his standards. So what is the difference between faithful witness and judging?
“Judging” is looking down at someone else, imagining yourself to be more worthy of God’s mercy, despising others for their weakness, lasering in on others’ faults while never looking at your own. St. Paul was once a Pharisee, and he knew the deadly danger of becoming one: “You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things” (Romans 2:1).
Here are more helpful attitudes to adopt: interpreting the words and actions of others in the kindest possible way instead of the worst . . . keeping your words soft and humble . . . if you must say things that point out someone else’s flaws, open your life up to correcting by that person . . . looking always to build up other people instead of tearing them down.
Imagine that Jesus is in the room with you and your talk. Would he like what he is hearing? You know, don’t you, that he is actually in the room?